Engineer
in
Hell
An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer - you're in the wrong place." So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in.
Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy.
One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?"
Satan replies, "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."
God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake - he should never have gotten down there; send him up here."
Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."
God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue."
Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"
|
Type in the questions to the words in bold in the text.
1.
? - An engineer does.
2.
? - The engineer's.
3.
? - He reports to it.
4. With
? - With the level of comfort.
5.
? - Pretty popular.
6.
? - Satan.
7.
? - There's no telling what.
8.
? - That an engineer should never have gotten down to hell.
9.
?- Having an engineer on the staff.
10.
uproariously? - Because a lawyer is also down there, in hell.
The
Smart
Blonde
A blonde woman boards an airplane. She is extremely exhausted and just wants to take a nap. She finally finds her seat and sits down next to a very curious young man.
He wants to test the whole dub blonde thing and possibly make some money out of it. "Hey, wanna play a game?" he asks her. "No thank you, i just want to take a nap." "Please, its really easy, all you have to do is answer the questions that i ask you. If you don't know the answer, then you give me five dollars, and if I don't know the answer to your question, then I'll give you five dollars."
"I really don't want to do this. I just want to take a nap."
"Oh but PLEASE pretty please. Okay, how about if I don't know the answer to your question, I'll give you five hundred dollars." The blonde woman became interested and decided to play the game.
"Okay. How many moons does
Jupiter have?" the young man asked. The woman reached into her purse and took out a five dollar bill. "What goes up the mountain with three legs and comes back down with four?".
The young man, determined not to lose, gets out his laptop and searches all over the internet for an answer. Flustered and confused, the young man hands the blonde five hundred dollars.
After a few hours, the young man was itching to know the answer to the question."What was the answer to the riddle?" the blonde woman reached into her purse and handed the young man a five dollar bill. |
1.
? - An airplane.
2.
? - Because she is extremely exhausted.
3.
? - Next to a very curious young man.
4.
?- To test her and possibly make some money out of it.
5.
? - When the young man's offer mounted up to five HUNDRED dollars, if he doesn't know the answer to her question.
6.
about the young man's question? - She did not. She gave him five dollars straight away.
7.
? - All over the internet.
8.
?- No, she didn't know it herself.