Written Expression
Задание
Минимизируйте вербальную часть предложения до критической степени сохранения сообщения:
1. Wild horses, which once roamed freely over the grasslands of Europe, Asia, and Africa, are found only in isolated patches of Southeastern Africa and Eastern Asia now.
2. In a digital camera, light entering the camera is focused on a charged coupled device, or CCD, which converts light energy into a charged electron.
3. A major stumbling block in the development of a viable hydrogen-fueled car is the expectation of many drivers that the vehicle will travel at least 300 miles before needing to refuel.
4. Prior to the development of germ theory, John Snow, a London physician, was able to halt an outbreak of cholera by restricting access to a water pump that he suspected was contributing to the spread of the disease.
5. Cores of ice, drilled from glaciers in Greenland and the Antarctic, provide climatologists with valuable data on Earth's prehistoric climate, including changes in the concentration of greenhouse gases in the atmosphere.
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Discussion
1. Wild horses are found in some part of Africa and Asia today. (or Wild horses are rare species of animals today) Верно?
Все верно.
Здесь по сути нужно оставить только минимум вербалики: деятеля-действие-объект = подлежащее-сказуемое-дополнение, ликвидировав многословие, но сохранить коммуникативно важные смысловые части, в данном случае:
сохранить наречие only;
now можно не заменять на today;
а some parts of можно убрать.
2. light entering the digitsl camera converts into a charged electron.
3. A hydrogen-fueled car will not travel 300 miles without needing to refuel.
4. John Snow halted an cholera by restricting access to a water pump
5. Cores of ice provided valuable data on Earth's prehistoric climate
2. нужно изменить залог
4. здесь поправить: an cholera
остальное очень хорошо сделано
2. light entering the digital camera is converts into a charged electron
4. a cholera
is converted
На залог упражнение: Voice - Simple Tense
без артикля тогда, либо оставить всю группу существительного: an outbreak of cholera либо свернуть в атрибутивную: a cholera outbreak