The Australian Queen was a good old boat. It was made in Townsville in 1896, and for years Ray and I took tourists out in it to see the jungle. It was Ray's boat, not mine. Ray was my boss. Poor old Ray! He's never forgotten that boat. We lost it last year. It happened like this ...
I was sitting in the coffee shop, having my breakfast - four cups of coffee and a beefburger. There wasn't any work to do. The tourist season was over. Ray came in about eleven o'clock. He sat down at my table.
'Hey, Sheila! I'll have an egg on toast and a coffee,' he shouted. Sheila came over to the table. She didn't like Ray. She didn't like me, either. But there was only one coffee shop in Woonawarra.
You haven't paid for yesterday's breakfast yet,' she said. 'Nor for the day before.' 'Mr Preston's paying,' Ray said. 'G'day, Croc' Ray always calls me Croc. He tells the tourists that I'm a crocodile hunter. It isn't true, but it's good for business.
'G'day, Ray,' I said. 'I'm not paying for your breakfast, mate. You haven't paid me any wages for two weeks. I haven't got any money. You're the boss - you pay.'
'Look,' said Ray, 'I've got an idea ...'
I told Ray then that it was a stupid idea. The old Australian Queen was a river boat. It wasn't made for the open sea. But Ray didn't want to listen.
'Come on, Croc. We need a holiday. It's a great idea. We'll take the boat over to one of the islands. We can do some fishing and sit in the sun. What do you think?'
Well, there are hundreds of islands near Woonawarra. The Great Barrier Reef is only about twenty miles away from the coast of Queensland. There was nothing to do in town, anyway.
'OK, Ray,' I said. 'I'll do it.'
It was a lovely morning when we left Woonawarra. Beautiful. Ray was sitting at the back of the boat, and he was singing. Ray is the worst singer in Australia. Maybe he's the worst singer in the world. I've never heard anyone worse, that's certain.
'Er, Ray,' I said, 'what's that book in your hand?'
I wasn't interested in the book, but I had to stop Ray singing.
'Oh, this?' said Ray. 'I bought this yesterday. It's a survival manual.'
'A what?' I said.
'A survival manual. It's for explorers, you know. How to survive in the mountains. How to survive in the jungle. That kind of thing.'
'There aren't many mountains around here,' I said. I was looking at the flat blue sea around the boat.
Yeah, well, there are a lot of ideas in this book. I was reading it last night. Look at this chapter: "How to survive in an open boat". It's a good book. It's got a lot of information in it. You know, you mustn't drink sea water. But you can drink the blood of sea-birds.'
'First you have to catch them,' I said. 'Give me another can of lemonade, Ray. I'm thirsty.'
One minute the sky was blue and the sea was flat. The next minute the storm hit us. The sky went black, and the boat was going up and down like a yo-yo. Water was coming over the sides of the boat, and then the engine stopped. Ray was shouting something, but I couldn't hear him. The wind sounded like a jet aeroplane. I didn't see the rock, but I felt it. The boat hit the rock, and stopped. Then I saw something in the distance.
'Come on, Ray!' I shouted. 'There's an island! We've got to swim towards it.'
The water was above my knees in the boat. I grabbed Ray, and we jumped.
The island was nearer than it looked. In fact, the storm washed us onto the island. We were lucky, because Ray isn't a very good swimmer. We lay on the beach in the rain. Ray was coughing.
'You idiot!' he shouted. 'I saw the rock before we hit it. I shouted to you, and you did nothing!'
'I couldn't hear you, Ray. Sorry.'
'And what about the storm!' he shouted. 'Didn't you listen to the weather forecast this morning?'
'No,' I said. 'Didn't you?'
Ray didn't answer, but he looked pretty angry.
The storm was quite short. Soon the sun was shining again, and the sea looked normal. We looked round the island. It was small. You could walk all the way round it in five minutes. We could see the old Australian Queen. It was on a rock about two hundred metres from the beach. It was in two pieces.
You'll have to swim out to the boat,' said Ray. 'We need food and drink. There's nothing on this island.'
I looked across the sea at the boat. Two hundred metres. I could swim two hundred metres easily. Then I saw them. Black triangles on the water. They were all round the boat. Black triangles ...
'Sharks!' I shouted. 'There are sharks out there. Look!'
Ray sat down heavily on the beach. He took something from his jacket pocket.
'It's OK, Croc,' he said. 'I brought this with me. We'll be all right.'
Ray was holding the survival manual. 'Don't worry about the sharks,' he said. 'Sharks are frightened of people. It's here in the book.'
'The book says that, Ray. You know that. I know that. But there's one problem. Has anyone told the sharks?'
We had a look at the book. The most important thing was a fire. We had to light a fire.
'You see,' said Ray, 'everyone knows we're out here. When we don't come back, they'll send helicopters to look for us. We have to light a fire. Have you got any matches?'
'Come on, Ray,' I said. 'I don't smoke. You know that.'
'It's OK,' he said. 'There are some broken bottles on the beach. We can light a fire with a piece of glass. There are instructions in the book.'
We went all over the island, and collected bits of wood and leaves. I sat on the beach with a piece of glass for an hour. But the wood and leaves were wet from the storm.
Ray sat and watched me. He read out the instructions from the book, but I couldn't light a fire.
'Hurry up, Croc,' he said. 'It'll be dark in a few hours. We can't light a fire in the dark.'
'We need something to start the fire,' I said. 'The wood will burn then.'
Ray heard the helicopter first. It was miles away, but the sound was coming towards us. I had an idea.
'Ray,' I said, 'Can I have a look at your book again?'
The helicopter crew couldn't stop laughing when they heard the story. Ray didn't think it was very funny. He never laughs when I tell the story now. I started the fire and the helicopter saw it. How did I start the fire? Didn't I tell you? It wasn't very difficult. I burned Ray's survival manual.